Sex Talk: Quality over quantity, anytime
Can you take a chill pill and relax, already? Three minutes of penetrative sex is very decent, assuming there has been more to the ceremony than just those three minutes.
It would be hair-raising if those three minutes were all there was to talk about the entire lovemaking session. Otherwise, when people accuse their husbands of not lasting in bed, they are not saying that go and pump yourself full of virility pills then come back and last forever, and ever, and ever, like that ka-piece of paper on Imperial Lather soap.
They are not praying for a husband that is at it for twenty minutes nonstop. That would be long enough for her to crest that hill, be on cloud nine for a while, then crash back to earth and then totally lose her cool at your endless antics. By lack of longevity, women mean men who get into bed, then immediately and unceremoniously fumble for penetrative sex, before ‘gloriously’ lasting a whopping five seconds!
Husbands, do not be pressurized into unrealistic peer demands and standards; it is no wonder that even young, able-bodied men are now turning to performance-enhancing drugs such as Viagra, because someone, somewhere has convinced them that what they are doing is not enough.
All I know is that no woman really wishes for a man to huff and puff, and huff and puff, until she starts to hear the suddenly irritating ticking of the clock in the next room. Until she goes numb. Until she starts to mentally do the dishes and write a shopping list.
Until she finds herself noticing the cobweb in the distant corner and wishing she could get it down. Until she mentally drives to Masaka and back! Longevity encompasses everything involved in lovemaking, gentlemen. From the time your minds connect and decide “it is going doooowwwn!” to the teasing, roleplay and anticipation, the foreplay, name it, until you come to the actual penetration.
When couples say they make love for hours, they are most likely talking about a lot more than just penetration – some couples are very playful and creative in that regard. If you eavesdrop on such conversations and silently vow to do something about your own intimate sessions, you just might kill someone’s daughter, if you don’t accidentally kill yourself in the process!
Researchers on sexuality and sensuality seem to agree that anything between three and seven minutes is enough for penetration; the average male longevity is five minutes from start to ejaculation.
But when there is a sexual performance-enhancing drug at play – especially when you really did not need it (as in, you don’t have a sexual dysfunction to treat) but just wanted to ‘show off ’ – you may last much longer, but that is not necessarily a win. All drugs, if abused, have side effects.
Keep that in mind. Also, female bodies, contrary to what you may have heard, have limits physically and emotionally during sex; so, you don’t want to become a nuisance. So, don’t be pressured by what you hear about other couples’ sex lives; people love to embellish the truth, especially where there is an actual problem.
As long as you don’t have a dysfunction (premature ejaculation/lasting mere seconds, or actual impotence), you are good. No pressure. Just make the preamble memorable too. What kills it all is you diving for your wife, as if you are just stealing the goods within a two-minute deadline; take your time and ensure quality over quantity.
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